August 17, 2011
Anyone dealing with infertility knows what true commitment it is - the emotional and physical toll it takes on your body, your mind, the doctor’s visits, and the financial burden. And as if dealing with infertility wasn’t hard enough now add work and this becomes a dangerous combination to those who cross your path.
Most people work because they have to not because they want to. Who goes to work because they love their job, enjoy getting bossed around, and then at the end of the week they are thrilled when they see their measly paycheck? Chances are your paycheck is going towards those uncovered infertility treatments and unless you are independently wealthy, work is a necessary evil.
Now add all of the other things that you need to deal with at the workplace. Should you tell or not tell the boss that you are going through infertility treatments, the never ending doctor’s appointments, and the weekly baby showers for every woman who works for the company except you. It’s fascinating how popular you become and how you are the talk of the office by your colleagues because they monitor your attendance better than your boss does?
Another thing that those fertile women don’t have to deal with is going to your boss and announcing that you are trying to have a baby and the good old fashioned way of doing things isn’t working – can you say mortified? But at the end of the day you have to do what works best for you. Always side with the decision that creates the least amount of stress for you as workplace stress should be the least of your worries.
The baby showers where every woman is pregnant and there is a party every week. Here you are at yet another baby shower wondering to yourself “why in the world am I here and do I even know who this pregnant woman is?” Yet you feel obligated to go to the shower because everyone else is going and you don’t want to come off as a miserable infertile woman.
So now you are able to sneak away from work for your always entertaining doctor’s appointment. You know the place where the medical staff at the office sees you every day but still feel the need to ignore you when you are standing at the desk to check in for your appointment. Yes, ignored because they are in a deep analysis with their co-worker about reality television and they conveniently do not see you standing there! If only these women really knew that an infertile hormonal mess was waiting for their conversation end so they could tear their heads off with their teeth.
Now on to the main event-the waiting room at the doctor’s office. There you patiently sit, watching all the women as they check in for their appointments. The women already waiting to see the doctor are sizing you up, trying to diagnose your infertility issues. “Hmm, what is her story? Old eggs? Bad sperm?” C’mon ladies, you know you have all done this at one point or another. It’s physically and mentally draining process but one thing you need to keep in your corner is humor. Remember when it comes to infertility; you are either laughing or your crying.
The truth of the matter is there is little you can control during the infertility process. But you can control what you tell your boss about infertility treatment. You can control if you want to attend those daily office baby showers. You can also control self –diagnosing those infertility patients as they walk into the waiting room. This is a hard and difficult journey so make your decisions based on how much stress it will or will not cause you. Always remember that laughter is the best medicine, even if it is in the doctor’s waiting room!